Friday, May 26, 2006

The I-Already-Feel-Pregnant-and-Nobody's-Fixin'-to-Buy-My-Apartment Rag

1. I can't stop eating, and neither can Nutmeg. My dad believes that Nutmeg is drinking "eat-more-and-grow" hormones meant for the fetus out of my nursies. Yes, I am my child's own bovine growth hormone factory.
2. All the people who were supposed to be interested in buying our SF place have changed their minds. Now we have to be one of those properties that sit and sit and sit, that people look at with suspicion instead of anxiety that they better bid fast or they won't get it.
3. I opened my parents trash cupboard today, and was overwhelmed by stinky, despite the fact that garbage day was yesterday and this cupboard was never stinky before. Know what that means? P-R-E-G-N-A-N-T.
4. It is so unfair that jerky jerk upstairs from us got way over his asking price and now we are probaby going to have to lower our price.
5. I already have this little stomach pudge from the last pregnancy. When I tried on the cute dress I'm going to wear to two weddings this summer and fall, it disconcerted me. Now when I wear that body-hugging dress, I won't be in the least self conscious, because, that's right, i'm PREGNANT. I'll be like, oh, look at my cute little bump. Even if it's really just that same lump of chub and stretched-out skin. People don't know that.
6. The whole point of spending thousands on staging and hundreds on a bathroom mini-makeover was NOT having to lower the price. Hmph.
7. Nutmeg's taking a nap, and I feel like joining her. Know why? Uh-huh. Pregnant.

Anyway, here's an update. Our new landlords, perfect in all other ways, refuse to put in a dishwasher after all. :-( This is a serious bummer for me. Now I have to purchase one of those portable dishwashers on wheels and hook it up to my sink after every meal. Which I will do, so help me, before I spend ALL FRIGGIN DAY washing dishes. I signed on for stay-at-home mommery, not stay-at-home dishery.

But on the bright side, America's finest moving company, Otto Nelson and Sons, will be pulling up to the apartment on Wednesday, and Epu, Nutmeg and I may start sleeping there on an air mattress as early as Monday, because we just can't stand to be separated from our beloved apartment any longer than that. And, we gotta buy more furniture.



Kori said...

Oh, dog nose. Pregnancy is so weird, isn't it?!

I'll keep your SF apartment in my thoughts, fingers crossed.

Anonymous said...

You sound like me when I was knocked up. Actually, my sense of smell is still stronger than it used to be. Often I'll be sitting around the house and just suddenly say, something smells, and go on a cleaning rampage. Dave just rolls his eyes.

Sorry about the SF place, but the new apartment sounds dreamy, lack of dishwasher and all.